All Things Probable
by Slyrr
Summary: Kim and Team Possible are confronted by a team of teen mercenaries who are thier opposites. Kim Possible finds herself nearly overmatched by Grimm Probable, Rhonda Fatigable, her weasel Rueful, and their computer hacker Jade. Now divided into chapters
1. Chapter 1  Waxing Poetic

**"All Things Probable"**

Kim Possible fanfiction

by Greg Fisk (aka "Slyrr")  
Kim Possible and it's characters are copyrighted by Disney, et. al.

Illustrated version hosted at:

http:// home. comcast. net/ gregfisk/grimmprobable1 .htm

(no spaces)

or at author homepage on fanfiction

Team Go dashed into the dimly lit warehouse. Hego spotted a gaping hole in the ceiling which opened up to the starry night sky, casting a dim circle of moonlight onto the surrounding boxes which were stacked in marked columns that disappeared into the gloom. He also took note of several unconscious security guards who lay on the floor.

'Look alive, Team Go!' Hego said. 'This is a top secret science facility. Whatever these thieves are after it can't be good!'

Mego rolled his eyes in annoyance. 'We _know_ that. You told us before we left, and at least twice on the way!'

Wego 1 looked in one direction while Wego 2 looked the other. 'Nothing's missing, Hego.' said WeGo 1. 'Whoever did this is still here!'

Suddenly a yellow glare washed over them and they all squinted their eyes shut. A shrill, cackling voice sounded from behind the source of the light, full of laughter and triumph. 'Quite right, Team Go! And may I be the first to say how impressed I am that you managed to get here so quickly!'

'Aviarius!' Hego shouted, pointing his arm dramatically. 'I should have known it was you! Only the city's most persistent bird-themed villain would break in through the roof!'

Mego rolled his eyes again. Why his brother insisted on talking like a 1950's comic book character was a source of constant wonder to him. All it ever did was give the villains a chance to capture them. He readied his Glow in case a quick shrink and dodge was in order. But Hego was still posturing and talking as their eyes adjusted to the spotlight.

'What are you after, arch-fiend?' said Hego, his voice thick with distaste. They could see Aviarius now, standing next to a spotlight, his winged outfit and his beak-like nose thrown in stark shadows by the glare.

Aviarius grinned wickedly. 'I suppose there's no harm in telling you, since there's no way you can stop me, Team Go!' He sneered. 'I'm stealing an ultrasonic device which will grant me absolute control over every pigeon in the city! Once these feathered minions are at my command, I will order them to hold every statue and monument hostage! If your beloved city ever wants to see their statues clean again, they will bow down and accept me as their supreme overlord! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!' He broke into a long string of laughter that seemed to go on forever. When he finally ran out of breath, he found Team Go staring at him. All their faces were creased into blank expressions that mingled confusion with incredulity.

'That's... the dumbest thing I've ever heard!' Wego 1 said.

'Mm-hmm.' said Wego 2.

Hego and Mego only nodded.

Aviarius sputtered in rage. 'Hey, shut up!' he said, pointing at them. 'Whether you are able to comprehend the brilliance of my plan is not the point!' A flock of robotic condors suddenly dove in through the ceiling and clamped their metal talons onto the large crate on which Aviarius was standing. They spread their wings and the jets on either side of their abdomens swiveled up, sparking into life. The crate shuddered and slowly began to rise. 'The point is, I'm taking the ultrasonic modulator, and there's nothing you can do to stop me!!'

Hego struck a fighting pose. 'We'll see about that, Aviarius! GO, Team Go!!' and he charged toward the slowly rising crate. Mego, Wego 1 and Wego 2 raced behind him.

Aviarius glared down at them with a confident smirk. 'I'm afraid not, Team LOSERS!' he said. 'You see, I didn't come here alone...!'

From the shadows on the side, a swift moving blur leaped from the darkness. It moved so quickly, they could not see who or what it was. But the figure landed a solid kick into Hego's chest which sent him sprawling backwards into his team-mates.

Team Go lay in the circle of the spotlight, rubbing their bruised heads and elbows. They looked up as the crate and Aviarius rose through the hole in the ceiling. He was holding up a camcorder. 'Farewell, Team Go! I leave now to burn a DVD recording of your failure! HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!' And the crate rose out of sight.

Hego surged to his feet. 'Come on, Team Go! We can still stop...'

But the lights suddenly went out. Mego felt a sharp pain on the back of his head and everything went black. Hego activated his Glow, and struck blindly here and there, and he made contact, but to his dismay, he heard Wego 1's voice cry out and heard a dull thud. 'Sorry, Wego!' he said. Behind him, he heard Wego 2 shouting.

'Hego, look out...!' he shouted, and then there was a loud _Whoof_ and another thud.

Hego was alone now. 'Where are you?' he shouted, his body bathed in a blue aura. 'Show yourself, evil-doer!' But there was only silence. Then off to the side, he heard a male voice.

'Ahem!' it said. Hego whirled around and saw what looked like a teenage boy. He could only guess, for his form was shadowed, with only a dim blue highlighting from Hego's Glow. They stared at each other for a moment. Then the figure spoke again. 'Come and get me, tough guy!' came his voice, smooth and confident.

Hego charged at him with a heroic shout. As he got closer, his glow revealed a smiling, relaxed boyish face, bathed in a blue light. Hego raised his fist to strike, but as he swung with a terrific haymaker, the figure darted to the side, vanishing into the darkness. Hego stumbled, lurched and plowed straight through a support beam. He had only a few splintered seconds to look up, hearing a dull creaking rumble, before the upper mezzanine and all the crates stored on it collapsed on top of him with a thunderous crash.

The figure stared at the pile of crates through his night-vision goggles. 'Well,' he said. 'That was easier than Aviarius made it sound.'

Another figure stumbled out from the shadows, tripping and landing with a thud next to the boy. 'Ow!' came a girlish, squealy voice. 'Sorry, GP.'

'Relax.' said the boy, helping the other figure to its feet. 'Hego will power his way out from under there in about thirty seconds. The rest will be waking up soon after that, but our work here is done.' He held up a small device, and a bright LCD glow came from a tiny screen on it. 'How's our exit?' he said briskly.

'The guards are all still hugging the floor and the cops won't be there for another five.' said a chirpy voice, slightly tinned through the device speaker. 'You're in the green!'

'And our payment?' said the boy. 'I presume Aviarius is trying to welch on the deal.'

'You guessed it.' said the tinny voice. 'But while he was there at the warehouse, I hacked into his bank accounts and deducted the money. Our contract is done and done!'

'Badical. You rock out loud!' Then he turned off the device and ran off into the darkness, pulling the second figure behind him.

A few seconds later, Hego burst out from under the pile of crates. All was quiet, except for the soft groans of his slowly awakening brothers.

The bell rang loudly across the fields and through the rooms at Middleton High. The marquee outside the school read "Give Greeks A Chance". History classes that day dealt with Greek and Roman Mythology, and Kim never ceased to be amazed. It seemed they designed the course subjects for no other reason than so they could put clever slogans on the marquee.

And once again, it seemed as if Mr. Barkin was the only teacher in the school. No matter which classes she took, or what subjects she studied, Mr. Barkin somehow wound up teaching at least one of them.

'And so the Roman god Janus was worshipped at the beginnings of the harvest and planting times, as well as marriages, births and other beginnings. He was representative of the middle ground between barbarity and civilization, rural country and urban cities, and youth and adulthood...'

Kim stared up at the two-faced statue drawn on the chalkboard, with one face staring one direction, and the other in the opposite direction.

Off to the side, she heard a familiar voice whispering. 'I normally don't go all ethnic KP, but two faces? Think of all the Nacos he could pack down!'

Kim smiled in spite of herself. Leave it to Ron to find a way to bring up Nacos in a lesson about Mythology.

'Stoppable!' Mr. Barkin's voice thundered across the row of seated students like a whiplash. 'Do you find something amusing about the mysterious and freaky two-faced god Janus?'

Ron fidgeted, straightening up in his seat. 'Ah... uh, no sir Mr. B.' he said, his voice carrying that same terrified and yet collected quality Kim knew and loved. 'It's all... Greek to me.' He ended lamely with a sheepish laugh.

Barkin growled like a thundercloud. 'Janus was _Roman_ Stoppable! You students need culture. Janus was used to symbolize change and transition, such as the progression of past to future, the growing up of young people. I want you all to write a poem to recite in class based on that theme. Now get _poetic_ people!'

The bell rang and all the students filed to their lockers, collecting books, chatting and getting ready to go to their next classes. Kim stood at her locker where Wade's computer screen sat blank and silent. Her mug shots of Drakken and Shego peered out at her from their spots taped to her locker door.

Ron was continuing the talk he'd started when they left Barkin's class. "Look KP, all I'm saying is that writing verse about 'growing up' is kinda heavy. You'd think as Seniors they'd bring up some courses that were a little more practical, like 'Get-Rich-Quick 101' or 'How to Rise to the Top in 1 Easy Step'. You know - something I could _use_!'

Kim smiled at him. 'Come on, Ron - this could be a big learning experience.'

Ron's eyes rolled upwards until he was staring at the ceiling. 'Yyyyyeah...' he said, his voice distracted and distant, 'Learning... sounds... great.'

Suddenly a white line lanced across the screen in Kim's locker and an instant later, Wade was staring out at them. 'Sitch me, Wade!' said Kim, her voice going brisk and business-like at once.

Wade set down his ever-present soda cup. 'I kept tabs on the theft at Go City like you asked, Kim. And I've set up a video link to Go Tower. Hego's ready to fill you in.' The screen blipped and the hulking, muscular frame of Hego now filled tiny glowing square. Ron and Kim both leaned in.

'Greetings, citizen Possible!' Hego said. Kim nodded, smiling. He hadn't changed at all. Still pompous, overly dramatic and 'show-offey'.

'Hey there, Hego.' she said. 'How are the rest of the team?'

'All of them back with get up and glow!' he said, clenching his fist dramatically. Ron rolled his eyes.

'Has Aviarius made his next move?' said Kim.

Hego smiled broadly. 'Actually, you'll be pleased to know that Aviarius in now in police custody.'

Ron blinked. 'So... he didn't try his pigeon thing?' he said quizzically.

Hego chuckled. 'Oh, he tried it all right.' The screen showed a video clip of flocks of pigeons roosted thickly on a large statue in the city square. People were looking up, confused. 'Anyhoo, once the folks in city hall stopped laughing, we zeroed in on the location where he was broadcasting his signal with the Supersonic modulator. Elapsed time from finding him to capturing him - 2 minutes, 12 seconds.' The screen flicked rapidly to scenes from surveillance camera footage, showing Team Go breaking into a building shaped like a bird nest, then dog-piling a struggling and ranting Aviarius, then Aviarius being hauled away in a police wagon.

Kim raised an eyebrow. 'Well... congrats I guess.' she said.

'Yeah, way to save those... statues!' Ron chimed in.

Hego's face blipped back on. 'I'm afraid that's not the end of it though. Whoever it was who helped Aviarius steal the Supersonic Modulator is still out there. There was no sign of them at Aviarius' lair. We're keeping our eyes peeled, but they may be something you need to watch out for.'

'Thanks Hego.' Kim said.

Then Wade's face returned. 'Hego's right, Kim. Whoever was working with Aviarius, I haven't been able to get a lock on them. No records, no files, nothing.'

'Stay on it, Wade.' Kim said. 'They may try to spring their bird-brain boss.'

'You got it, Kim!' Wade said, and the screen went black.

Ron gave her a sly look. 'And may I say,' he said, 'that was big, bad, bodacious, bemungeous use of alliteration!'

Kim smiled as they walked down the hall to their next classes. 'For someone who doesn't care who Janus is, you remember big poetry words easy enough.'

Dr. Drakken stumped up and down the musty dankness of his new lair. He looked around in disgust. The computers were broken, the wiring was frayed and sparking - and the whole place reeked of mildew. Shego sat filing her clawed gloves. Drakken gritted his teeth. Why she was always so indifferent and dismissive was beyond him, but he put up with it because she was the only sidekick he had who could put up a decent fight.

He sat down in the chair at the main console, which had a cracked screen and wouldn't turn on, throwing papers here and there. 'Death ray 9.0... Gravity gun to pull the moon from orbit, giant magnet to reverse the Earth's polarity... no, no _no!'_ he crumpled fists full of evil plans for world domination in his hands, but the simple reality of his current situation was crashing down around him. But before he could say it himself, Shego said it first.

'Face it Dr. D. We can't afford any of that stuff. We're flat busted!'

'THANK you Shego,' he said sarcastically, 'for once again pointing out the glaringly obvious! How can I take over the world when I have to do it from this pathetic hovel?'

Since the Diablo robots and other gambits had failed, Drakken had found himself with less and less money to launch his evil schemes. Kim Possible had thwarted each one, reducing his ability to concoct new schemes further and further each time.

'Here's another 'glaringly obvious',' said Shego, inspecting her claw tips after going over them with a file, 'If we don't get some money - and I mean pronto - we won't even be able to stay in this pathetic hovel for very long.' She looked at Dr. Drakken as he rose from his chair and stopped in front of the non-functioning main console screen. 'Look Dr. D - we've got no choice. We need to pull a heist.'

'I know!' he snarled without turning toward her. 'Stealing money just seems so... pedestrian!'

Shego lit up one of her gloved hands with it's greenish light. 'We can't make a scene if we don't have the green,' she said coyly.

'Cute.' Drakken said, turning back with a scowl. 'But you and I both know that if we try something as simple as knocking over a bank, or Fort Knox, or whatever, Ms. "All-That" will just show up and stop us. We need to find a way to keep her off our backs while we procure our needed funds. But _how_?'

Shego made a thin-lipped smile. 'We could re-synthesize Eric...'

Drakken waved as if swatting a fly. 'Oh _please_.' he said. 'Don't you remember that Possible and... whatzizname are an 'item' now? She won't fall for the same trick twice. What we need is a diversion.'

Shego had turned to the only working computer in the lair, an outdated model that was barely internet capable. She smacked it a few times while it chugged and whirred.

'Shego, are you _paying attention_?' Drakken said impatiently.

'Diversion! Whatzizname! Item!' she said in exasperation. 'Relax Dr. D - I'm doing a search for 'diversions'.

Drakken hovered behind her, staring at the screen. Every search string for 'need help' only brought up Kim Possible's website. Drakken felt the angry tic he always felt in his eyebrows whenever he saw her face. 'Try 'evil villain needs help',' He said, waving his hands and raising his head in disbelief. This was so foolish, he thought. As if people who help villains advertise on the web. What a colossal waste of...

But then he heard a beep and Shego said, 'Hey - it actually brought up something.' Drakken returned to her side, staring down at the screen as Shego read. 'Trying to take over the world? Global Justice keeping you down? Local authorities won't leave you alone? Meddling kids uncovering your plots? Don't think your dream of world domination is impossible - it's probable!'

Shego and Drakken looked at each other for a moment. Then Shego clicked the web link. And for several minutes they stared silently, their faces illuminated by the computer screen.

'No _way_...' Shego said softly. Dr. Drakken's face split into an evil grin.

'Way!' he said.

Chapter2

A Gin and a Snare


	2. Chapter 2  A Gin and a Snare

All Things Probable

Chapter 2

A Gin and a Snare

Kim had already finished her meal at Bueno Nacho. Ron, as always, took longer to finish because he ordered so much more. She had her foot nestled snugly against his, staring at him with a wistful smile. Ron looked up while Rufus still kept gobbling away at his Naco.

'You know KP, it's not easy to focus when you do that.' he said with a faint smile.

'Mmm-hmm.' she said. They gazed at each other in silence for a while. Rufus peeked up, and said 'Awwwwwwwwww!' before returning to his Naco.

Ron had a few crumpled pieces of paper off to the side, ruins of the few starts he had tried making on his own poem. She herself had not started yet. Ron was grimacing as he erased another line. 'Why is this so _hard_?' he said, gritting his teeth. 'I went on Celebrity Search and totally winged the Naked Mole Rap. This should be a easy!'

'Not worried.' said Kim lightly. 'I'm all about change, progression and advancement from one level to the next. I am gonna wow that crowd!'

'That would be a first.' said a familiar snide voice.

'Hi, Bonnie.' said both Kim and Ron flatly. Bonnie stood off to the side with her hangers-on lurking behind her. 'Can we _help_ you with anything?' said Kim.

'Just hoping that you don't make a total fool of yourself by reciting a lame poem next week. Not that I care if _you_ look bad, but your lame-ness might reflect badly on the school - which would make _me _look bad. So try not to stink up the class too badly with some square recital.'

'Trust me, it'll be totally rad!' said Kim.

Bonnie stared at her with a look of mingled contempt and amusement. 'Totally _rad_?' she said, an insolent smirk pulling one corner of her lips off to the side, 'Not with moldy dialogue like that. Barkin said Janus was supposed to be about progression. And you're still using catch phrases from the stone age.'

Bonnie and her entourage walked away, their giggles echoing through the air. Kim turned to see Ron with his hand on his brow, shaking his head.

'What?' said Kim. '_What_?' Ron was staring at her as if she had a tree growing out of her head.

'Kim... that was totally... _unhip_.'

'What are you talking about?' she said.

'Unhip. Not current. Non-trendy. I mean, I hate to agree with Bonnie on anything, but she was right.'

'But... I'm still hip!' said Kim defiantly. 'Aren't I? Still funky-fresh.'

Ron raised one slow eyebrow. 'Uh... people don't say 'funky-fresh' anymore.'

Kim's face fell. 'They don't? Since when?'

Ron looked grave. 'Since ages ago! Haven't you stayed current?'

Kim looked uncomfortably off to the side. 'I've... _we've_... been busy lately! Really? No one says it?'

Ron smiled. 'Relax Kimmy, it's natural when you get older to be less in touch. Besides, we don't _have_ to be hip anymore - we're dating!'

Kim was flabbergasted. Later at home, she threw her things onto the desk chair and lay down on the bed, staring at the ceiling. The more she thought about it, the more it bothered her. And the truth of what Bonnie and Ron said sank in on her. She hadn't read "Teen Scene" for weeks. She remembered skipping Agony County - not once but twice because of her schedule. Her job at Club Banana took up so much time, between that and Cheerleading practice, and her constant travels here and there across the globe, not to mention the time she and Ron were spending together...

She stared at the ceiling, then reached to the night stand and picked up Teen Scene. She looked glumly through the first article, noting how many words sounded unfamiliar. Had she been letting her relationship with Ron and her other responsibilities make her 'square'?

The Kimmunicator beeped it's familiar fanfare. Kim pulled it from her pocket and said "What's the sitch?' almost reflexively, but not really paying attention.

Wade answered. 'Got a call from Professor Lloyd at Stafford labs in Nevada, Kim. Security has been put on alert. Apparently someone made a threat that they were going to steal some...'

'Top secret equipment?' said Kim.

Wade squinched one eye. 'Don't _do_ that, it's freaky!' he said. 'But yeah. Someone made an anonymous tip-off.'

'Got us a ride?' Said Kim.

Wade shrugged. 'You know it.'

Ron gripped the armrests of his seat as the supersonic jet roared through the sky. Why did he always have to eat so much? He knew that at any given moment, he could be pulled along on a high speed jet ride, or be careening the skies on a parachute, or riding some roller-coaster of doom, but he still stuffed his face every afternoon. Kim was talking to the pilot.

'Thanks for giving us this lift Mr. Willis.' she said brightly, lowering the visor of her helmet.

'Not a problem, Ms. Possible.' said WIllis. 'It's the least I could do after you saved my plane from crashing over Area 51.'

'No big!' she said. 'Anyone could fix a damaged fuselage with bobby-pins while hanging from a wing at 2,000 feet.'

Willis glanced over his shoulder. 'No big?' he said, 'Do people still say that?'

Kim felt a sinking sensation inside her that had nothing to do with the g-forces of the plane.

Ron gulped. His mucho-grande size meal was churning inside him. He heard Kim shout back at him. 'We're over the drop point, Ron! Let's go!'

Ron unbuckled his seat belt and stood up wearily, the parachute strapped on his back rankled uncomfortably against his neck. As he approached the open door at the side of the plane and stared out into the empty void of blue sky, he turned to Kim. 'Just once - couldn't we _land_ at an airport?'

Kim gave him a dour look and jumped out of the plane, pulling Ron after her.

'Waugh!!' Ron squealed as they tumbled out into the air.

Barely a few minutes later, they were strolling through the corridors of the Stafford science labs, with Professor Lloyd escorting them. Ron was staggering and clutching his stomach. Luckily, or unluckily, he and his lunch had not parted company during their plummet toward the earth, nor during the back-and-forth descent with their parachutes. The halls were as antiseptic and orderly as Kim had ever seen in any of the many top secret facilities she had been to, but there was a very high number of guards posted at every door.

'As you can see Ms. Possible,' said Professor Lloyd, a short rotund man with glasses and a rather thick German accent, 'since we were contacted, the entire base has been mobilized. No one can get past our security. Still, I was glad to summon you, for you can never have too much protection.'

'Can you tell us who it was who tipped you off?' said Kim.

'Curious thing,' said Lloyd. 'We were sent this letter. You can see for yourself.' He handed Kim a ragged piece of paper. Kim opened it and Ron leaned in, with Rufus scampering up his arm and perching on his shoulder.

The note seemed like it was pasted up from various letters cut out of magazines. It read, "On the night that falls in yet two days, your deadliest weapons will be stolen away". Kim held up the note to her Kimunnicator. 'Wade - you seeing this?'

'Yeah,' came Wade's voice. 'Analyzing.'

Ron sniffed. 'Is that note... perfumed?' he said, looking puzzled.

Kim sniffed too. 'Yeah - and it seems familiar.'

Wade piped in. 'It should. That note was pasted up from letters cut out of an article in "Teen Scene" magazine. The paper and font are a perfect match.'

Kim nodded. 'The perfume samples in the ad pages!'

Ron smiled and raised an eyebrow. 'How did you know it was "Teen Scene"?' he asked. 'Isn't it written for girls?'

Wade looked uncomfortable. 'I've... uh, _heard_ about it.' he said.

Kim came to his rescue. 'So we're looking for - what - teenagers who need top secret weapons?'

Wade shrugged. 'If it's the same people who were helping Aviarius, the weapons here could be just the thing to use for a jailbreak.'

Kim was all business. 'The note came here the night before last. If it's telling the truth, the theft will be tonight.'

Ron's voice rose to it's high pitched squeal. 'But that's crazy! With all these goons running around, how do they expect to pull it off?'

'I don't know,' said Kim, looking intense. 'But when they get to the labs, they'll be in for a surprise!'

Chapter 3

Grimm Probable


	3. Chapter 3  Grimm Probable

All Things Probable

Chapter 3

Grimm Probable

Night fell gradually over the base. High above in the sky, a jet plane soared and two silent figures leaped from the jet. Two parachutes unfurled and the figures descended. The first landed neatly on the roof to the weapons facility. The second tripped as it landed and let out a squeal, quickly muffled as the first figure laid a hand over the other's lips.

The two figures dashed across the roof. From their backpacks, they unloaded several orb-shaped objects, then donned two gas masks. The first figure dropped an orb into each air conditioner vent, while the second threw one orb off the edge of each corner of the building. There was a sudden hissing, and with amazing swiftness, a grey mist billowed from the vents, and rose from each side of the facility.

The soldiers and guards barely had time to cough once before they fell unconscious to the ground. The mist spewed into every room in the base, and within moments, everyone was comatose.

The ceiling inside the main weapons storage rooms was blasted apart. Debris and dust crumbled down, and then the two figures dropped to the floor. They stood in front of a reinforced vault door. The first figure clamped a box-shaped object to the door just next to the massive wheel which served as the vault handle.

Suddenly, the dark room was lit with a blaze of light. 'Hold it right there!' Kim stood, confronting the dark figure with Ron at her side. The other figure stood at the edge of the light, still half-hidden in shadow. 'You've just entered a no-creep zone!'

The figure tapped the box on the vault door and Kim saw that it was some kind of timer. The digital readout began ticking down. 'No-creep zone?' said the figure. 'That was totally _unhip_.' He turned around.

Kim's first impression was that he looked somewhat like Josh Mankey. But there were differences. His face was slightly more rounded. He was shorter, but looked more athletic. His eyes were hazel and his spiked hair swooped forwards, not back. He was wearing a black shirt and brown cargo pants - exactly like theirs. He smiled wryly at them.

'You're late, Kim Possible.' he said. 'I expected you to try and stop me _before_ I took out the guards. At least then they would have been awake to help you. I suppose you thought it would be cooler to jump me inside the base. So the drama.'

'Who _are_ you?' Kim asked, staring at the newcomer.

'Grimm.' he said, smiling broadly. 'Grimm Probable.'

'No _way_!' said Ron. He turned to Kim. 'He's... he's like_ you_ with a Y chromosome!' He turned to Grimm again. He couldn't be sure in the light, and found himself asking before he could stop himself. 'Is your hair _red_?'

Grimm frowned slightly. 'It's _auburn_. Deal with it.'

Ron jumped forward. 'Well we still outnumber you Mr. Auburn hair! Deal with _that_!'

'Outnumbered?' said the second figure. 'What am I doofus-boy, chopped liver?'

A shadowy figure flipped forward. 'Whaauuuuuuahh!' came a squeaking voice. 'Whaaaauuuuugh yayayayayya!!!' Then the figure tripped and fell down beside Grimm. It was a girl, who looked about Kim's age. Her face was more oval than rounded though. Her blonde hair was pony-tailed and her face sported freckles on either cheekbone. She wore a black shirt and cargo pants, identical to Grimm's outfit. She flipped up onto her feet and struck a fighting pose next to Grimm.

'Smooth entrance, Rhonda.' said Grimm with a faint smile.

Kim and Ron gaped. '_Rhonda_?' said Ron, his voice rising to a squeal. 'No way!!'

'That's right, losers!' said the girl, striking various kung-fu poses. 'Rhonda Fatigable is in the hay-ouwwwwse!'

'I don't _believe_ this!' said Kim.

Grim shrugged. 'Hey - she's a bit of a klutz, but she always comes through in a pinch.'

Rhonda's face shone brightly. 'Been best friends since Pre-K!' She and Grimm tapped fists and smiled.

'This is freaking me out!' said Ron, waving his hands around frantically as if he were being attacked by bees. 'Next she'll be saying she spent one horrible childhood summer at camp!'

'What?' Rhonda said, her face blanching. 'Who... who _told _you that?'

Beside her, Grimm, sighed and shook his head.

Ron's mouth fell open. 'Was it... Camp Wannaweep?'

'No! Kamp Kwitcherbeliakin.' said Rhonda, her face falling.

Grimm covered his face with a hand. 'Oh man,' he said, 'do _not_ get her started on Kamp Kwitcherbeliakin...'

'Worst summer of my life!' Rhonda wailed, a faraway look in her eyes.

'And yet you won't stop talking about it...' Grimm muttered.

'Stop it!!' Ron squealed. 'You guys are totally ripping us off!'

Grimm stared icily at him. 'Hey, _we_ were here first.' he said. 'That means you're ripping _us _off!'

'Sorry to break up the awkwierdness,' said Kim. 'But you're both are trespassing - and that's more than enough to put your ripped-off butts in jail!'

Grimm raised an eyebrow. 'You really _are_ unhip.' he said. 'And stupid if you think you can stop us. You see that timer on the wall of the vault? Once it hits zero this vault will crack wide open and all the weapons inside it will be _ours_ for the taking.'

'Not gonna happen!' Kim said, standing at the ready.

'Gonna!' said Rhonda.

'Bring it on.' said Grimm, twitching his fingers in a 'come get me' gesture. 'I've been looking forward to matching skills with you since we set up this caper. You're about to learn the difference between all things possible - and all things probable!'

Kim advanced slowly. '_You_ sent that note - to lure us here!'

'Wait a minute!' said Ron, staring at Grimm. 'You read _Teen Scene_?'

Grimm paused a moment, then turned to Rhonda. 'I _told_ you not to use Teen Scene to paste up the letter.' he said, shaking his head. 'It's too girly.'

Rhonda dug the floor with her toe. 'But the perfume samples are so nice...'

Kim dashed forward, flipping and landing in front of Grimm. She lashed out with a quick strike, but Grimm neatly blocked her. She followed with roundhouse kicks, but Grimm leaned almost casually so they missed him.

Ron looked at the vault door. He had a clear run at the timer, and started dashing across the room towards it. He didn't doubt for a moment that Kim would mop the floor with this Grimm character, but he figured it couldn't hurt to break Grimm's little toy. But as he circled the room and made for the vault, Rhonda landed in front of him, blocking his way.

'Sorry doofus-boy, but no one interrupts the G-man at work!' said Rhonda, striking a pose that looked more comical than combat-ready.

'Hate to break it to you, but your boyfriend's going down!' said Ron, putting up his best Monkey Kung-Fu stance.

Rhonda's looked suddenly uncomfortable. 'He's _not_ my boyfriend!' she said, a pink tinge flushing on her cheeks beneath her freckles. Then she started screaming, high and shrill. 'Hoyaaaaaaaah! Ya-ya--ya-ya-yahhhhh!' she cried, leaping to the attack.

Ron spun around and went into a defensive crouch. 'Boooyaaaaaah! Wah-wa-wa-wa-waaaaaaah!!' he squealed, then leapt to meet her.

They half-collided, half tumbled in mid-air, both of them landing in a tangled crash on the floor. They rose up, both of them still wailing their battle-cries, and their arms became a blurry mirror as they both began slapping at each others hands, their faces turned away from each other, their eyes squinted shut, trying to break through each others defenses.

'Hey! Ow!' Ron squealed. 'Ow! Ow ow ow ow ow!!!'

'Ouch!' Rhonda said. 'Ow! ow ow ow ow ow!!!'

'Rufus!' Ron shouted. Rufus darted out of Ron's pants pocket with a high pitched 'Heyahhh!'

But at the same moment, Rhonda cried out too.

'Rueful!!' Her backpack zipped open and a small weasel scurried out, crawling down her shoulder. It jumped into the air with a shrill 'Hiyaaaa!!!' Both animals collided, just as Ron and Rhonda had done, and fell to the floor where they both began slapping at each other in nearly perfect imitation of what their masters were doing.

'Ow! No.. ow! ...way!' Ron said, gaping while still fending off Rhonda's slaps.

Kim stared in amazement. Ron and Rufus were both being occupied by Rhonda and Rueful. The timer was still beeping it's countdown.

Grimm stood between her and the vault. 'Come on, Kim.' he said coolly. 'Those two can sort things out for themselves. If you want to stop me - you'll have to get past me on your own.'

'Not a problem,' she said, going into her fighting stance. 'Haven't you heard? I can do anything!'

Grimm raised an eyebrow. 'Oh really?' he said, with a faint smirk. 'Then prove it. Can you surrender?'

Kim paused. If she said _no_, she'd be contradicting what she just said - but if she said _yes_...

Grimm let out a soft, barking laugh. 'Gotcha there, didn't I?' he said.

Kim growled. This guy was really getting on her nerves. She flipped, jumped and launched at him in her best flying kick. But Grimm merely shifted his stance and she tumbled harmlessly past him. She continued the roll, landing steady on her feet, then backflipped, jumping at him again. He ducked smoothly and cartwheeled to the side before standing up and facing her again, still with that relaxed smile on his face, as if he found the whole thing amusing.

Kim approached him more cautiously. She was not afraid. She had never been afraid of anyone, and she wasn't going to start with this bizarre opposite. But she had become almost used to the cheerleader leap and flying kick combo catching her opponents flat-footed, and found herself momentarily baffled that it wasn't working on Grimm. 'Nice moves.' she said evenly as they circled each other.

'Thanks.' Grimm said, smiling. 'Wish I could say the same to you, Kim. But frankly, your moves are slipshod and amateurish. I was told you were 'all that' - but you're _not_!'

Kim froze. 'Drakken.' she said softly. 'You work for Dr. Drakken?' She glanced quickly to either side, expecting Shego to charge into the fray.

Grimm only smiled that cool and calm smile at her. 'If you want answers, you know how to get them. Or maybe you can only beat your opponents by _boring_ them into submission!'

With her teeth gritted in fury, Kim charged at him.

Ron and Rhonda were still slapping each others hands.

'Ow! Ow ow ow! Owwwwww!' Ron yelled.

'Ow ow ow! Ow! Owwww!' Rhonda wailed.

'Ow ow! Hey! Hey! Come on, this is getting us nowhere!' Ron said, pulling back for a moment.

Rhonda pulled back too, staring angrily at him. 'Agreed!' she said.

They both stood, panting and staring for a moment. Then just as quickly, they stepped forward and started slapping again.

'Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow ow ow!! Ouch! Ow!!!'

Meanwhile, Rufus and Rueful were circling each other, both growling and baring their teeth. They met and clashed, rolling and twisting in a fighting ball of naked pink skin and soft brown fur. Rufus emerged on top, grasping one of Rueful's feet and tickling it hard. 'Koochie-koochie-koo! Koochie-koochie-koo!' he squeaked gleefully while Rueful let out a high pitched, chittering laugh. Tears of hilarity were leaking from Rueful's eyes, but he twisted his long body and grabbed one of Rufus' feet, tickling it with his furry paws.

'Katoochie! Katoochie!' Rueful said, and Rufus twitched and began laughing. They both rolled and twisted as they tickled each other's feet, both laughing fit to burst. And all the while, the timer on the wall continued it's insistent countdown.

Kim threw punches and kicks in rapid succession, but found each blow neatly countered by Grimm. He still seemed relaxed, almost like he thought she was funny.

'You split your focus in too many directions, Kim Possible.' said Grimm, with the air of teaching a lesson to a student who just didn't get it. 'You're not as good as you might be. Your fighting style is just one example. I can tell that you know at least ten different styles...'

'Sixteen!' said Kim proudly, squaring off against him again and trying to maneuver him into a position better to strike.

'Whatever.' said Grimm, shrugging. 'But I can also tell what you're thinking. Do I strike with Bajiquan or Huquan? Should I feint with Tae Kwon Do or Zi Ran Men? You've studied so many different styles they all get muddled in your brain and you can't decide which one to use until it's too late.' He spoke calmly, even as he continued blocking blow after blow.

Kim felt a surge of anger as he spoke, and struck harder, faster. But Grimm blocked each move she made.

'You're half-way decent at sixteen forms of kung fu.' he said. 'I've only studied one - but I've mastered it! The most flexible and all-encompassing form of Kung Fu - Tai Shing Pek Kwar!'

Kim stared in shock. '_Monkey_ Kung Fu?' she said. 'No way!!'

'That's why you can't touch me, Kim. I know Tai Shing Pek Kwar so well I can counter any of your half-baked moves. You may be able to do anything - but you don't do anything very _well_!'

Kim felt hot fury boiling up inside her. She launched a flurry of blows, just as she had on the night in Bueno Naco headquarters when she was fighting Shego. Her hands were a blur of motion and she redoubled her efforts. But Grimm weaved and sidled away from each blow with seemingly relaxed ease.

Then he suddenly lashed out with one outstretched palm, and Kim fell sprawling back onto the floor. Grimm slowly reverted to a ready position as Kim got to her knees and stood up.

'So.. you've got no problem hitting girls?' she said darkly, feeling a sharp pain in her ribs.

Grimm smirked. 'What can I say? I'm an enlightened guy. When girls ran around all those years saying they wanted 'equal treatment', I thought they were _serious_.' He looked down at her as she continued getting to her feet. 'Were you actually going to try and hide behind the old 'don't hit me, I'm just a girl' routine? How pathetic can you get? Better try something else Kimmy. The clock is ticking!'

Kim looked over Grimm's shoulder to the timer on the wall. Counting down to zero. She pulled out her hair dryer/grappling hook launcher and fired it into the ceiling. She saw another grappling hook hit the ceiling only a few feet away from her own. She started swinging around in a smooth arc, seeking to speed around Grimm and reach the timer from the side, but as the winch in the dryer pulled her up, she found Grimm swinging right beside her.

She lashed out with a kick, but her leg and Grimm's crossed in mid-air. They both arched and kicked, and wound up pushing off from each other. Kim flipped and landed, with Grimm landing a few feet in front of her. He was still standing between her and the timer.

'Try something _better_.' he said with a wink.

Kim looked at the timer, gauging the distance. She pulled the scrunchie from her ponytail and with a flick, she sent it flying toward the blinking red button on the timer. At once, Grimm took something out of his pocket and with a smooth motion he threw it. It struck Kim's scrunchie in mid-flight and deflected it neatly away from the timer. Kim stared in stunned disbelief as the object he had thrown skidded to a stop on the floor.

'Was that... a boy scout knife?' said Kim.

Grimm was staring too. 'Was that... a scrunchie?' he said.

They stared at each other. 'Tick-tock, Kim Possible.' Grimm said, going back into a ready stance, waiting for her next move.

'Wade!' said Kim, whipping out her Kimmunicator. 'I need a remote deactivation!'

'I'm on it!' said Wade's voice.

Grimm had pulled out his own communicator. 'Jade - we've got static!' he said.

'I'm on it!' said a voice through the speaker.

Kim gaped. '_Jade_? No way!!'

Wade was typing quickly, going through routines and safety locks which protected the timer device from remote tampering. Whoever had set it up was good, but in just a few seconds he'd have it hacked...

A window opened on his monitor, showing a young girl, who looked about the same age as him. She looked Asian, thin and pretty, and had colored streaks in her spiky hair. 'I don't think so, hacker-boy!' she said, smiling. He saw her typing on her keyboard.

Immediately, one of the safety locks he had disengaged was re-sealed, then another. She was blocking his intrusion attempts, re-writing the code...

'Bring it on, hacker-girl!' he said, smiling and cracking his knuckles.

Both of them hunched over their keyboards, typing madly. For several moments, they dueled electronically, with Wade cracking codes and penetrating safety routines, only to find new ones being laid in place, and others re-sealed.

He sweated, glancing up, seeing that she was glancing at him, beads of sweat running down her own face. He kept at it, keeping on the pressure. All the while, he used every other tap of his hands to keep probing, trying to find her IP address...

Finally he thought he had it, and launched the spike program he had been preparing while he dueled with Jade.

In her dark computer room, Jade's computers suddenly went off, the monitors fading black and a couple of them sparking. 'Oh _man!!'_ she said angrily.

'Ha!' Wade said, flush with triumph. She had been good, but he had used their duel to distract her while he readied his trap. It would take Jade some time to restore her systems, and in the meantime he would be free to...

Suddenly his own monitors turned off, his computers suddenly deactivated. Only his main screen remained on, with a jpeg image of Jade's smiling face and underneath it, the words 'You've been JADED!'

'Oh _man!!!_' Wade said in dismay. She had planted her own bug in _his_ system, and he hadn't even noticed. He started working feverishly, rewiring his system, trying to restore power. He hoped Kim could manage, because this time he couldn't do anything to help her...

Kim looked around desperately. Ron and Rhonda were still engaged in their ridiculous slap-fight while Rufus and Rueful continued tumbling around the room. Her Kimmunicator had gone black. Wade was gone, and the timer was still counting inexorably to zero. She was face to face with an enemy who seemed able to counter her every move, and for the first time in her life, she felt worried that she couldn't stop him.

'It's just you and me, Kimmy.' he said. 'No friends to carry the water for you this time!'

She leaped at him with a desperate cry, her foot extended in another flying kick. For a moment she thought it would connect. But Grimm deflected it with another circular sweep of his arm. His other forearm connected with her chest and he whirled around, slamming her to the floor and pinning her.

The timer clicked to ten... nine... eight...

She struggled wildly, but Grimm countered and twisted her arm behind her as she rolled, pinning her against the floor again.

seven... six... five... four...

Kim could see the timer and felt a wash of fear creep over her.

three... two... one...

The timer hit zero with a loud buzzing sound. But nothing happened. Grimm flipped backwards and away from Kim, standing on the pile of rubble beneath the hole in the ceiling. 'Rhonda, we're done here!' he said.

She broke off from her contest with Ron and dashed to him, standing by his side. 'Rueful!' she shouted, and the weasel darted away from Rufus, across the room and leaped onto Rhonda's shoulder.

Kim surged to her feet. Ron, panting heavily, sauntered over beside her, Rufus scurrying at his heel. The vault remained closed fast, but Grimm fired his grappling hook into the air. The line went taut and Rhonda put her arms around his neck.

'You... weren't after the weapons?' Kim said.

Grimm smiled. 'I couldn't care less about this junk,' he said. 'I was only sent to make sure you were kept busy while my client made his own move. The timer was just to let me know when _he_ was finished.' The winch in his grapple-gun whirred. He, Rhonda and Rueful shot up through the hole in the ceiling.

Kim gritted her teeth, taking out her own grapple-gun and firing again. 'Come on!' she shouted, taking Ron by the hand. They both flew upwards as the winch pulled them. It wasn't too late - she could still head them off.

But Grimm reached in his pocket with his free hand and took out another pocket knife, sending it in a whirling arc where it neatly severed the line of Kim's grappling hook.

Ron wailed as they crashed in a graceless heap on the floor. They got up, a cloud of dust rising around them, the rope from her grapple gun falling in coils on top of them. From far above, they heard a gloating shout.

'Hey, Kim!' Grimm's voice echoed down. She and Ron looked up. Grimm was leaning over the edge of the hole in the ceiling, looking down at them. There was a brilliant flash of light and she saw him put a camera into his backpack. 'I'm calling this one "A portrait in unhip!"

'That's a keeper!' yelled Rhonda, waving down to them. Then she shouted at the top of her lungs, 'Booo-YAH!' and she darted away, swallowed up by the darkness outside.

Kim and Ron sat on the floor, still looking up where Grimm and Rhonda had escaped.

'No... _way_...' said Ron quietly.

Chapter 4

Enemy Mine


	4. Chapter 4 Enemy Mine

All Things Probable

Chapter 4

Enemy Mine

Back in the lair, Drakken stared with satisfaction at a towering pile of money. He and Shego had raided the City National Bank and made off with everything. With no Kim Possible to interfere, it had been child's play.

'Ah, _money_!' he said, giving the cash an affectionate hug. 'How I've _missed_ you!' Shego stood back, staring at him.

'Would you like some time alone with it?' she said with her typical sarcastic air.

'Maybe.' said Drakken dreamily, staring with watery eyes at the currency.

Shego shuddered and let out a breathy 'Ugh!' of distaste.

The sound of a door closing interrupted them, and they turned to see Grimm and Rhonda walking into the room.

'I'm glad to see your heist was a success.' said Grimm. 'What did I tell you? With our help, the world is your oyster.'

Drakken smiled, but stared expectantly at him. 'And _your_ mission?' he said. 'Do you have the item?' Grimm handed Drakken a glossy photo of Kim and Ron, lying on the floor, covered in dust and tangled with rope, looking dumbstruck. Drakken took it with a gasp of delight and then broke into a cackling laugh. Shego looked at him with a raised eyebrow as he clutched the picture to his chest, tears of laughter rolling down his cheeks. 'Oh this is delightful!' he crowed. 'I'm going to digitize it and make it into a T-shirt!'

Grimm stood passively. 'I took a gamble with you not paying in advance.' he said. ''Because of us, your bank job was a success. So it's time to discuss our fee...'

'Yeah, about that...' said Shego, stepping forward. She was used to Drakken's crooked ways and thought she knew what was coming. "Should I give them the 'standard' payment, Dr. D?' she said, sinking into a crouch and powering up her hands with a green halo.

Grimm and Rhonda went into fighting stances at once, but Drakken, still laughing so hard he had to steady himself against the table, held up his hand, clutching the photo in the other. 'No! Wait... wait a minute!' he said. He took a couple of breaths and straightened up. 'I was going to double-cross you and keep the money, but I'm just so _goosed_ by all this I can't bring myself to do it!' He took some bundles of cash from the immense pile on the table and threw them to Grimm, who caught them deftly in his backpack. 'Take it!' said Drakken, practically dancing around the table. 'Take it - you're worth every penny!'

Shego stood amazed. He _must_ be happy, she thought. Drakken not backing out on a deal was an all-time first. She stared at Grimm with slitted eyes. Drakken had never acted this happy with any of _her_ work.

'We'll be on our way then.' said Grimm. 'You have the funds needed for whatever it is you're planning next. Must be big.'

'Oh it'll be big!' said Drakken, turning his eyes back to the money. 'It'll have the whole world begging me to take over!!'

'Sounds interesting.' said Grimm. 'Of course, there's no guarantee that Kim Possible won't show up and ruin _that_ scheme...' he let his voice trail off.

'What?' said Drakken, whirling to them with his face suddenly fearful and angry. 'You mean you didn't _finish_ her?'

Grimm shook his head. 'That wasn't the deal.'

Drakken stomped forward, livid. 'Oh I see your little game!' he said furiously. 'Get us hooked with the first job and then jack up the price! Well, that's just... _wrong_!' he said, his voice dropping to an aggrieved sulk.

Grimm stared back at Drakken. Rhonda stood beside him, grinning and waving sheepishly. 'You're free to try your scheme without our help.' he said. 'Aviarius thought he could go it alone after our first job together. Now he's in jail.'

Drakken raised his hand and opened his mouth as if to speak, taking in a gasping breath. Then he stopped. Then he repeated this action a couple more times before pausing and lowering his arms. His brow knitted into a scowl, and his teeth gritted. 'Fine!' he said, his teeth almost sparking as he gnashed them. 'How _much_?'

'Lots.' said Grimm cagily. 'But a lot _less_ than what it would cost if Kim throws you back in prison.'

Drakken stared for a moment longer. 'You have a point there.' he said. He looked at Grimm coldly. 'Can you _guarantee_ that Kim Possible will not interfere with the next phase of my plan?'

Grimm smiled and nodded, with Rhonda behind him nodding energetically. 'Believe it.'

Kim stood sweating in her karate gi, her breath coming in ragged gasps. She had gone through every martial arts routine she knew, over and over again. Every muscle ached, but she couldn't bring herself to stop. Grimm's words kept tearing through her mind like a knife.

_'Your moves are slipshod and amateurish.'_

She launched a flurry of blows against the wooden dummy, striking, kicking and leaping around it with all the skill she could muster.

_'You split your focus in too many directions.'_

With a scream, she struck out and snapped one of the arms off the wooden dummy. It thudded onto the mat. She fell onto her knees, wheezing and gasping. She clenched her fists, her nails biting into her skin.

_''You may be able to do anything - but you don't do anything very well.'_

She felt tears welling in her eyes. 'Kim?' she heard Ron's voice speaking timidly behind her. Quickly she fought back her tears and looked up. Ron was staring at her, and she could see the worry in his eyes. 'Are you OK?'

She didn't answer, but looked down at the mat, still panting heavily.

Ron walked up and knelt down beside her, putting a hand on her shoulder. He had been practicing too, but he had stopped after a couple of hours. He had left, with Kim saying she would only be practicing for a little while longer. That had been four hours ago. 'Wow...' he said, staring at the broken dummy and the two other broken dummies piled in the corner of the room. 'He really got to you, didn't he?'

Kim struggled to keep her voice even. 'He _beat_ me, Ron. He didn't play me or trick me. He _beat_ me. I tried everything I knew, and it wasn't good enough!' A horrible feeling of helplessness still hung over her like a cloud. Grimm had cut off the support network she had come to know and rely on. Ron, Rufus, Wade - all of them isolated from her during the fight until she was left alone to face Grimm. She had tried her level best to stop him, and she had failed. The only reason why nothing had been taken from the labs was because Grimm hadn't even _wanted_ anything. He had set the whole thing up just to keep her busy - and she had fallen for it like a world-class sucker.

She felt a tear drop heavily onto her knees as she spoke. Gritting her teeth, she fought hard to control herself.

'Ron,' she said. 'Am I... losing it?'

Ron's voice became defiant. 'No way, KP.' he said. 'Don't even _think_ like that! So he caught us by surprise the first time out. No big - we're on to him now!'

Kim looked up into his eyes. There was no trace in him of the doubt or despair that she had been feeling. She sometimes wished she could be as full of wonderment as he was, for it seemed to put up a shield around him that no amount of defeat, or hopelessness or overwhelming odds could penetrate. She threw her arms around him and pulled him close. The tears she had fought back streamed down her cheeks.

'Oh _Ron_...' she said.

Ron said nothing, but just held her.

The Kimmunicator made it's familiar beep. Wiping her face with her sleeve, Kim ran to her gym bag and fished it out. 'Wade! You're back on line?'

Wade's tired face stared out from the screen. 'Can't keep a good system down, Kim!' he said brightly. 'Jade did a number on all my computers, but I finally got things back to basic operational status.'

'So what's the sitch?' she said.

'I did a search for the names Probable and Fatigable. Jade must be shielding their real locations somehow because I can't track them down, not even through their website. I've even searched for Kamp Kwitcherbeliakin and come up empty.'

Ron poked his head over Kim's shoulder. 'They've got a website, too?' he said. 'No _way_!'

Wade nodded. 'Yeah. They're a for-hire group of teen mercenaries, offering their help to any criminal or villain who needs them.'

'Drakken's their client.' said Kim. 'Grimm let it slip during the fight.'

Wade continued. 'You called it. While the brou-ha-ha was going in between you and Team Probable in the labs, there was report of a robbery at the City National Bank. Witnesses confirm it was Shego and Drakken.'

'Bank robbery?' said Ron. 'That's kind of a step away from his usual 'take-over-the-world' routine.'

'He hasn't given up on that.' said Kim, realizing what it meant. 'He just needs money to make it happen.'

'And now he's got it.' said Wade. 'Which means...'

'On to phase two.' said Kim.

'Which is...?' Ron piped in, shrugging and putting his palms up in query and looking expectantly at Wade.

'Sorry guys.' said Wade. 'No idea. All I can do for now is keep digging and keeping an eye out for anything suspicious.'

Kim knew better than to distract him any longer. 'Thanks Wade. Keep us posted.' She turned off the Kimmunicator, leaning against the wall.

Ron laid a warm hand on her shoulder. 'Don't worry KP.' he said assuringly. 'Next time, they're _ours_. We just need to find a way to put them off their game.' He stood up and moved to the door. 'Though in the meantime, I've still got poetry to write - and so do you. We're all about progression here.' Before closing the door behind him, he smiled. 'You've gotta learn to be like me. I don't care if I'm hip or not. I is what I is, and that's all that I is. Learn to embrace your inner Kim!'

The bell rang shrill through the air next day at Middleton High. The marquee outside the school now read, "How To Cope With Failure". Kim reflected grimly that maybe the marquee wasn't changed to reflect the class content of the day, but was somehow rigged to comment on _her_ personally.

In class, Barkin stood with a scowl on his face as one of the students continued his recital. The student had the typical disinterested drawl of someone trying to prove that he was too cool and smart to be doing what he was doing, and yet doing it so badly he came across as neither cool nor smart.

_Janus was a dude, who had two heads..._ he said, tugging at his sleeves as he spoke.

_He was a Roman god, but now he's, like, dead._

With that, the student made a shoddy bow and shuffled back to his desk.

Barkin let out a soft sigh that turned into a muffled 'Ugh!'. 'Next up - Kim Possible.'

Kim stood before the class and cleared her throat. She had spent a sleepless night in front of the piece of paper she now held in her hands. Despite Ron's assurances, she had wondered if she was truly losing it - and if maybe she wasn't even 'hip' anymore. She also wondered if what she was doing with her life was making her weaker, uncoil, and what kind of person she would eventually become as a result. The thankful faces of everyone she had ever saved or helped swam before her eyes as she pondered all of this and she had come up with one question - could she give it up and walk away?

And she knew the answer was no. She liked helping people - and she came to the understanding that she would do it whether they thanked her or not. It was just who she was - and she liked who she was. She held up her notes and began to recite.

_As the days turn to months and the months turn to years,_

_And as the wonder of life finds it's challenge in fear,_

_When all the world rises in storm and in rage,_

_Join the power of youth with the wisdom of age._

_All of life is a journey, from which we can't hide,_

_And it's most treasured secret - to savor the ride._

_For with all it's grand vistas, its light and it's splendor,_

_There will also come darkness and storm clouds with thunder._

_And what we become on this journey we take,_

_Depends not on others, but the choices we make._

_And there will be many with all their own thoughts,_

_Who would choose your path for you more often than not._

_Be steadfast and firm, to thine own self be true,_

_For no one can choose your path better than you._

_They may say you're not cool, and that just isn't fair,_

_Past, present or future, it's hip to be square!_

The class whooped and cheered. From his desk, Ron gave her the thumbs-up. Bonnie sat with her usual scowl firmly in place, which more than anything else, Kim took as a sign that it had been great.

'Well done, Possible.' said Mr. Barkin, standing up. 'You can't go wrong with rhyming couplets. This poem gets my best grade ever - a B-minus.'

Kim smiled and waved at the cheering class.

Students milled through the hallways between classes. Kim checked in with Wade.

'Still nothing, Kim.' he said apologetically. 'I can't track them down. This Jade who's hacking for them keeps heading me off.'

Kim had a brief flash in her head of Janus. One head facing forward - the other facing back. Two directions. One personality. 'If Team Probable is as good as we are, then we may need to change our thinking.' she said. 'He's working for Drakken at the moment. Change your focus and try tracking him down. If we find Drakken, we'll find Grimm.'

'On it.' said Wade, and the screen went black.

As she closed her locker door, she saw Ron standing there looking at her. 'Here's a thought KP.' he said. 'If Grimm really is as good as we are, he might guess we'd try to find him that way.'

'What else have we got?' said Kim, her voice depressed and sullen. 'The only other thing we could do is wait for them to make their next move. The aggressor always sets the tone. We've got to take the fight to him.'

Ron looked pensive, running his hand up the back of his head. 'You know, I think they could be closet shippers.' said Ron.

'Shippers?' said Kim.

'_Relation_shippers.' said Ron. 'I think Grimm and Rhonda - they kinda _like_ each other...'

Kim sighed. 'Ron, we're trying to find a way to beat them, not get them to hook up because you think they'd be cute together!'

Ron was waving his hands excitedly. 'No, follow me here KP. Maybe we can do both at the same time! You heard Rhonda.' he raised in voice to a squeak in mock imitation. 'He's _not_ my boyfriend! It was the same sort of stuff we kept saying before we started shipping.'

Kim felt the wheels in her mind starting to work. 'Yeah.' she said.

'Well, you remember how when... _that guy_ showed up?' He still could not bring himself to say Eric's name out loud. 'I thought you would wind up with him and it totally threw me off my game?'

'And I got thrown off my game when Eri... I mean, _that guy _played me.'

'Yeah...' said Ron, shifting uncomfortably from one foot to the other. 'I mean - maybe if we got team Probable thinking about shipping it would throw them off their game.'

Kim felt a smile creeping onto her face. 'Break out the matchmaking gear, Ron.' she said. 'It's time to get romantic!'

Chapter 4

Closet Shippers


	5. Chapter 5 Closet Shippers

All Things Probable

Chapter 5

Closet Shippers

It was night. Kim, astride Ron's scooter, roared towards a foreboding structure perched atop a cliff. It looked shoddy and run down, but Wade had identified it as Drakken's lair in short order. 'You sure he's there Wade?' she said into her Kimmunicator.

'Positive.' said Wade's voice. 'Drakken's lair was easy to track down. Even easier than usual.'

'Thought so.' said Kim. 'Don't move against Jade until I'm alone with Grimm. That's when you may get your shot.'

Inside the lair, the now-functioning viewscreen showed a tiny red blip approaching the base. Grimm stood looking up. 'She's alone?' said Grimm.

'Looks that way.' said Jade, her face popping up in a small window on the viewscreen.

Grimm scowled. 'I don't like it.' he said. 'She's not _that_ foolish. Keep sweeping the base. Make sure Stoppable and the mole rat don't get in.'

'On it, GP.' Jade chirped, and the window closed.

Grimm turned toward the door. The base wasn't that large, and Kim wasn't that far away. A few seconds later, the main door burst open, a scooter sped through and screeched to a halt, and Kim leaped and tumbled into the room.

Grimm snapped his fingers and Rhonda leaped to his side, both of them at the ready. 'Very confident or very foolish - but which is she?' Grimm said, staring down at her from the main console platform. 'Coming here by yourself, Kim Possible? You couldn't beat me one on one. What makes you think you can win alone?'

Kim glared up at him. Then she unbuckled her backpack, letting it drop to the floor with a thud. Then she threw her grapple gun down next to it. 'I didn't come here to fight. I came to talk.'

Grimm looked confused for one brief instant. Then his cocky smile was back in place. 'Talk is _cheap_ Kim. If you're thinking to divert me, think again.'

'I haven't stopped thinking since our last fight.' Kim said. 'Thinking about what you said. And... you were right about me.'

Grimm shook his head. 'Nice try, Kim.' he said. 'But girls don't _ever_ admit that guys are right - about anything!'

'I do.' said Kim. 'Can we talk... _alone_?' she said with a pointed glance at Rhonda.

'No way, pom-pom!' said Rhonda defiantly. 'Grimm and I are package deal! Anything you want to say to him, you can say it to my face!'

Grimm kept staring silently down at Kim. 'Rhonda,' he said. 'Take Rueful and check the corridors, the roof and the vents. Make sure Stoppable isn't here.'

Rhonda turned to Grimm. Her voice was a squeaky whisper. 'What?' she said. 'You're not gonna listen to that carrot-topped harpy are you?'

'I said, _check the corridors_.' said Grimm quietly.

Rhonda looked stunned. But she closed her eyes and turned, walking slowly out of the room. She looked back briefly before the door closed behind her.

'All right Possible.' he said. 'Let's talk.'

Jade had over a dozen monitors, each one with several windows open, each one showing the view from a different camera. She had an eye on each of them, as well as keeping constant watch on her routers, modems and firewalls.

She raised an eyebrow and zeroed in on one screen. Grimm and Kim were alone in the main room together. Not fighting. 'Wierdness.' she thought. She stared at them for nearly two minutes. They were just talking. She realized she was ignoring all the other monitors and started checking them again, but suddenly Wade's face appeared on each one of them.

'Thanks for the opening!' he said brightly.

The entire room went black. From the darkness, Jade's voice sounded exasperated and whiney. 'Oh _man_ not again...!'

Wade contacted Ron. 'OK Ron - you're clear to move!'

Rhonda stumped the corridors, muttering to herself. She made a squeaky imitation of Kim's voice. 'Can we talk _alone_?' she simpered. 'Just who does Miss 'bare-midriff' think she is...?'

'She's Kim Possible!' Rhonda whirled and saw Ron leaning against the wall with Rufus on his shoulder.

'Doofus-boy!' she said. he took out a whistle that let out a silent note and Rueful sprang out of a ventilation duct, scurrying to her side. 'Come back for another drubbing?'

'No,' said Ron, still looking calm and relaxed. 'I'm here the same reason you are. Kim wanted to be alone with Grimm.' he put heavy emphasis on the last word and was pleased to see Rhonda's freckled cheeks turning red.

'Grimm won't fall for that routine!' Rhonda said, advancing toward him. 'You'll see!'

'Is that why you're out here, and she's in there?' he said.

Rhonda growled. 'Rrrrrrr!' she said. 'I'm gonna mop the floor with you first - and then your ugly partner!'

'I think it's cute that you're jelling over your boss.' he said, pouring on the sly edge to his voice.

'I'm _not_ jelling!' Rhonda said, stamping her feet. And she charged at him. Ron took out the 'Kissy-Face' lip gloss and with a deep breath, he opened it. Greenish fumes filled the corridor. Rhonda saw it and took a deep breath. She struck at Ron a few times and Ron managed to dodge. Luckily, he was ready. With his other hand, he took out a picture that Wade had digitized, showing Grimm and Kim kissing. It was faked, but the instant Rhonda saw it, she gasped, and the moment she did, her head rolled back and her mouth fell open, her tongue lolling out with a thin trickle of drool.

'Aaaawwwwooooooouuuuuugh!' she said woozily, and collapsed to the floor. Rueful lay asleep next to her, also overcome by the knock-out gas.

_'None too soon_,'thought Ron, screwing the lid back onto the lip gloss. He wouldn't have been able to hold his breath much longer. So far the plan had worked. He cuffed Rhonda's hands together. Now it was all down to Kim.

'I won't be distracted by feminine wiles.' said Grimm.

'I understand you a lot better than you think.' said Kim, stepping closer to him. 'I know you spend a lot of nights awake wondering if you'll ever find anyone. Worried, that in spite of everything you've done, no matter how skilled you are, that it still won't impress anyone enough to want to go out with you.'

Grimm glared at her. 'How do you know that?' he said.

'Because I know _me_.' she said. 'And I felt the same way.' Kim looked up at him. 'We're not... so different.'

Grimm chuckled softly. 'Nice.' he said. 'Is this where I'm supposed to say that you and I were destined for each other - and I repent and forsake my evil ways? Or do you expect me to believe that you're prepared to walk away from your life just so we can go out?'

'I'm not asking for either.' said Kim. 'I'm just asking... for a chance.'

Grimm raised an eyebrow. 'A chance for what?' She was getting closer, and every instinct he had was screaming that he should spring into action. But a curiosity even stronger was fighting them down. He reasoned, if there was trouble, Jade and Rhonda would be letting him know, and he trusted them. And he was confident that one on one, he could take Kim down, no matter what she pulled.

Kim didn't answer, but stood in front of him and took his hand.

Ron crept into the room and saw Grimm and Kim. He felt a burning anger as he saw Kim's hand in his. '_Easy,'_ he thought. _'It's just an act...'_ He moved toward the console, edging closer.

'Is this so bad?' Kim said, squeezing his hand lightly.

Grimm's eyes softened for the briefest moment. 'I...' he said, but in the reflection of Kim's shining eyes, he saw a flicker of movement that was not him or her. He whirled around and saw Ron standing at the console. 'You!' he said, his voice furious. Then he felt something clamp around his wrist and saw that Kim had locked some kind of manacle on his wrist.

'Go Ron!' Kim shouted, dodging the lightning-fast punch that Grimm threw with his other hand.

Ron dived forward and clamped a second manacle on Grimm's ankle. Grimm leaped up and out from where Kim and Ron had him surrounded. Kim was right behind him with Ron shouting 'Booyah!' and making another dive.

Grimm took out his grapple gun and with one neat motion he fired and made a graceful swing around the room, making for the door. But Kim was now swinging after him, and though she could not block him, she threw a third manacle which hooked around his left ankle with a satisfying click.

Grimm looked at his wrist and ankles. 'I don't know what you're planning but it won't work!' he said angrily. 'Where's Rhonda?'

Ron stepped forward. 'Let's just say she's on time-out!'

'What have you _done with her_?' he roared, charging at them with a whirling leap and kick.

Kim was shocked by his sudden fury, but she rolled with his strike, and all three of them wound up in a tangle on the floor. Grimm was struggling to wrestle his way loose, and pushing Kim down onto the floor, his hands squeezing her wrists cruelly.

Ron was grunting, pushing his hands up from where he lay with Grimm kneeling on his stomach. Grimm's feet were in his face, but he twisted and slowly forced his way up. 'Kim!' he shouted.

Grimm raised a fist to strike, and just as he was bringing it down, Ron placed a fourth manacle on his left wrist. Grimm blinked, and saw Kim holding up a small remote with a red button, which she pressed with a smile.

The manacles hummed, and a powerful magnetic field activated. Grimm struggled, but his hands and his feet were slowly pulled closer together until they connected. He stared furiously at Kim and Ron, his hands and feet effectively locked together.

Ron smiled. 'They're 'electro' magnets!' he said. And Grimm suddenly felt a charge go through each of his arms and legs. With a cry of pain, he collapsed to the floor.

'Way to go, KP.' said Ron weakly, his face still sporting the print of Grimm's shoe.

'Couldn't have done it without you!' Kim said, tapping his fist with hers.

Outside the lair, Grimm, Rhonda and Rueful were locked up in handcuffs. Rueful was scampering back and forth in a small cage. A police wagon and guards were leading them out. Kim stopped the guards from closing the doors after Grimm, Rhonda and Rueful were loaded in.

'Where's Drakken?' said Kim, glaring at him.

Grimm stared, his face angry, but still with an edge of satisfaction. 'You're too late. By now he's long gone with the weapons from Stafford base.'

Kim stared. 'You said you didn't want those weapons.'

Grimm smiled. 'I didn't. But Drakken does. The weapons theft was just to give him access to the technology. The money was so he can build them bigger and better. Saying I didn't want the weapons was enough to put you off the trail and get them to lessen security at the base. Drakken had an easy run after that.'

Kim smiled. 'Well he'll have to make his next move _without_ your help - which means _I'll_ have an easy run.'

Grimm said nothing. She was right and he knew it.

Rhonda stood up, defiant even in handcuffs. 'You think this is over?' she said. 'It's not over until the G-man _says_ it's over!'

Grimm sat with his eyes downcast. 'It's _over, _Rhonda.' he said, his voice low and flat.

Immediately, Rhonda sat down next to him. 'OK, I got nothing.' she said, her voice now quiet.

Just before the doors were closed, Kim cried out. 'Hey, Grimm!'

Grimm and Rhonda glanced up with dour expressions from where they sat shackled in the police van. They blinked as the flash in Kim's camera went off. 'Now _that's_ a keeper!' said Ron, grinning as the wagon drove off.

Inside the police wagon, Grimm thudded his shackled fists into the bench on which they were sitting. The wagon sped down the road, heading toward the police station in the distant city. 'I can't believe I fell for the pretty face scam.' he said, his voice sounding frustrated and tired. 'I feel like such a _dork_.'

Rhonda looked at him. 'Come on Grimm - they didn't beat you, they just played you. Besides, there are plenty of girls out there who'd love to be with you.'

Grimm didn't look at her, but lowered his head. 'Yeah, right.' he said, his voice sarcastic. 'You really think there's a girl out there for a guy like me?'

Rhonda looked down. 'Out there...' she said. 'In... here...'

Grimm looked at her and Rhonda looked up at him. Their eyes locked. 'Oh... really?' he said, his eyes softening.

Slowly, they leaned closer, and very tenderly, they kissed. When they broke apart, he kept staring at her, and the light that was shining in her eyes lit in his as well. 'Woah.' he said, the smile returning to his face. '_Woah._' Rhonda blushed furiously and took his hand.

Suddenly Grimm's communicator bleeped and turned on. 'Woah!' said Jade's tinny voice. 'Should I come back later?'

Grimm eyed the shackles binding them. 'No, Jade.' he said, smiling and slipping a lockpick from inside his glove. 'I think we're ready to check out.'

The police van continued driving down the road. Suddenly, it screeched to a halt. There was a violent lurching, and the van bounced up and down on it's tires for a few moments. Then the doors opened and the two cops driving it flew out of the driver and passenger doors, landing on the ground by the side of the road with loud, rolling thuds.

Grimm and Rhonda peered out of the windows of the wagon after closing the doors. 'When you see Kim Possible,' Grimm shouted to the driver, who was getting up on his hands and knees, 'Tell her she's a lousy date!' The wagon screeched off and vanished down the road.

Later at Bueno Nacho, Ron sat with her at their favorite booth. 'How's this for progression, KP?' he said, holding his own poem aloft. 'C-plus!'

'Congrats, Ron.' she said. 'I think it's safe to say we've both gone up a level. I just wish Grimm hadn't gotten away.' She looked out the window, frowning.

Ron looked at her curiously. 'Something wrong, KP?' he said, blinking.

'He said I was a bad date! Me! Can you imagine?'

'Yeah, the nerve of that guy.' said Ron, smiling. 'He doesn't know what he's missing. And I hope he never does.'

'Thanks for putting up with the act, Ron.' she said, her voice demure and warm. She took his hands in hers and held them tenderly. 'You're the best.'

'No, you are.' said Ron, gazing at her slyly.

'No, you.' she said, looking back at him with a smile.

'No, _you_.' he said, taking her hand.

'No, _you_.' she said again, taking his other hand. Their voices became steadily more crooning and cutesy with each back and forth.

'Do you _mind_?' came Bonnie's voice from the booth behind them. 'There are people trying to eat here!'

Ron and Kim looked at Bonnie's glaring face for a moment. Then they looked back at each other.

'No, _you_.' said Kim.

'No, _you_.' said Ron.

'No, _you_!'

'No, _you_!'

Bonnie growled and stormed away from her booth. 'You two are so _disgusting_!' she grated as she left. After a while, Ron fell silent, staring at his now empty tray.

'So now there's something wrong on your end?' said Kim.

Ron looked up. 'Wade still can't find them?'

Kim shook her head. 'They've disappeared. And we never did find out where they're really from.'

Ron looked up. 'So they'll be back someday?'

Kim smiled. 'Don't worry, Ron.' she said. 'We beat them once. We can do it again.'

Ron didn't look satisfied. 'I was thinking, KP.' He said. 'When 'shipping put _us_ off our game, we came back from it closer and stronger than ever, right?'

Kim looked back at him. 'Yeah...' she said.

'So.. by getting Grimm and Rhonda to 'ship and putting them off _their_ game, does that mean they'll come back stronger too?'

Kim looked back at Ron. 'No _way_.' she said, but there was a doubtful edge to her voice.

The End


End file.
